NEWSFLASH!

It's that time again! More headlines for you from our beloved weekly paper.  I shall begin with what is probably the greatest front-page headline of all time:

IT'S A SLOW NEWS WEEK


I had to read it a few times just to be sure.  "wait, is this...?  does that....?  faaantastic."   A thing of beauty! The rest pale in comparison, but I've come to appreciate the dedication to honesty.  For example:  


WEEKLY NEWS NOT QUITE SO HOT OFF THE PRESS 


Yes, thanks for that.  And the rest are in that typically Kenilworthian tone that I can't quite put my finger on.  It has something to do with turning headlines into questions and calling people by their first names.

DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS 'BOMB'
REALLY TURNED OUT TO BE?

HOLY SPIRIT SERVED BY TOWN PUB

IT'S A JOB FOR CRYING OUT LOUD

WHAT A LOT OF LEGO FOR ANDREW

APARTMENT IS IN A CENTRAL LOCATION

FAMILY MEMORIES COME FLOODING BACK FOR KATHLEEN

GOLDILOCKS AND THE THREE BEARS

SSSHHH!  KEBAB HOUSE

THE CHAMPION POTATO GROWERS OF KENILWORTH

LEEK WOOTTON'S ANCHOR INN SENIOR CITIZEN'S MEAL

WHO IS MRS GILLET'S UNCLE?

THE PROOF THAT TOM WAS IN A 1947 PANTO [PLAY]

GREAT SCOTT, WHERE HAS IT GONE?

DESPITE THE COLD,THE SHOW DID GO ON

OLD FOLKS REVEL IN TOWN'S CARNIVAL ATMOSPHERE

FAMILY GET ON ITS BIKE FOR CARNIVAL [British grammar!]

ARE YOU IN THESE PHOTOS?

WHO IS THIS BEARDED GENTLEMAN?

3 comments:

Super L said...

Yay! My favorites this time are "Apartment is in a central location" and "Who is this bearded gentleman?" Was it Mrs. Gillett's Uncle?

Katie said...

I just realized that I should tell them about Gracie! Imagine the headlines they could produce!

KT and Lance said...

I love the headlines! How fun to live in a place where there are actually days that they have no headlines! What a fabulous place!

I'm so sad about your Moped...I had a moment of silence for her!

I love the Canary Island pic's! You two have the best photo albums!!!

One more thing...I wish I could be like those Irish sheep herders, it sounds so peacful!